In 2023 there is no shortage of strange things about culture. From fashion to social media, and dating, there’s a lot of problematic things going on. Some are lesser or more in their severity, but there’s no question that there is and should be things we push back on. This past week, I was reading a pop culture story and see headlines giving me pause. The language they use promotes ending a relationship as the norm, and worse still, it actually should be normal.
Modern culture isn’t a place I look to for something to admire or a moral heading to emulate. Still the things I find in my content quest are disappointing. One is the idea that we only require a relationship, in this context we’re talking romantic, for so long as it “feels good.” The reason for this rabbit trail is a recent celebrity story.
DISCUSSION | THE CONTROVERSY OF ‘THE LITTLE MERMAID’: CHANGING NOSTALGIA
✨ WHAT IS CULTURE'S OBSESSION WITH TAKING AN EASY OUT?✨ TALKING CULTURE AND THE OBSESSION WITH RELATIONSHIPS ENDING. #CULTURE #DISCUSSION #LOVE #RELATIONSHIPS Click To TweetIf there’s anything pop artists are known for, it’s writing revenge songs or breakup ballads. One many consider the best in this is pop star Taylor Swift. Swift, a teen artist who rose to fame after her self-titled country debut, featuring songs like ‘Tim McGraw’ and ‘Teardrops on my Guitar,’ has also had more than one famous break up. The tabloids have covered many of these, but truth is, her fans are also obsessive about her different relationships, breakups and what hidden messages her songs hide.
Her latest relationship far as we know has been going on for six years. Keeping her life now, as a 30-something adult, quite private, no one knows much about Swift’s relationship with British actor Joe Alwyn. Save for the lyrics she writes which many ascribe to her private romance. This past weekend, multiple publications wrote pieces that Swift and Joe Alwyn have called it quits.
The articles frame this in a kind of “rumor” way citing “sources” who say that the couple ended things a few weeks ago without drama. One article even frames the end of a relationship saying, “the relationship had just run its course,” quoting a source.
This is, for lack of a better term, a terrible thing to say.
How sad that entertainment writers, even if that’s a quote they obtain, write about a relationship like this. It frames relationships as disposable, as if they’re an old file we place in our digital recycle bin when we’re bored.
Relationships don’t always work out. This is very true. Sometimes there are real and genuine reasons why this happens. But if Swift’s songs are personal and written about her ‘Lover,’ I do wonder how she goes from that to “run its course.” Any relationship can change over time. Individuals change which means that affects both people. Life sets in. Or maybe you’re not prioritizing the relationship. Whatever it is, sometimes, if both people don’t want the same thing, you end things, hopefully sooner rather than later.
However, after six plus years, it’s hard to understand how two grown adults decide they no longer fit. Six years means affection, love, habits, inside jokes, holidays, laughter, tears, and so many more shared experiences.
No one knows what goes on in a relationship, but the notion that six years in two people decide not to put in the work is sad. Sometimes it’s necessary, but just because something wears off doesn’t mean you give up. You have to work through the challenges to rediscover the good. Usually, it’s worth it.
Culture’s obsession with empowerment and this idea that happiness requires us to, essentially, chase ourselves, isn’t a social pro. Until we challenge this and change the way we view love, we’re going to keep repeating these unsettled pursuits. We’ll continue to see relationships end, and all in the name of self-love empowerment. Something that too often is mistaken for something it’s not.
What are your thoughts on this topic? Do you agree, disagree or haven’t thought about it? How do you think social media or articles spin culture ending a relationship? What do you think of Swift and Alwyn? Are they still going strong or do you think they’re over? Comment all of your comments. Let’s talk about all the things!
PINTEREST PIN – SAVE & SHARE
Thank you for visiting; please do come back soon